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You are a good listener; I can open up to you more freely. You are not a good listener; you have never given you ears to me then how do I open up to you. Maybe these words might have been heard by you at least once in your lifetime. If you are in a love relationship then you might have heard these words more often in your life. Being a good listener can build good relationships with people. The relationship is not just any love relationship but also various kinds of relationship in your life like business relationship, good counselor, good teacher, good doctor, good lawyer everything. Being a good listener is an inevitable need of life. It’s useless if you say, I’m a good speaker rather than a good listener because you are a good listener only because someone else is a good listener. Have you ever thought of how you can be a good listener? Let us check out How to Listen; Tips to Boost your Listening Skill.
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Be Non-Prejudice to the Speaker
This is the first step you need to adapt while you want to be a good listener. If someone approaches you to say something, they might be thinking a lot about how to day the matter to you. Maybe the person who wants to talk about the matter may consider the matter a s of great importance. When he turns up to you and starts to say things, you suddenly say this is just like that or just a simple matter will make the speaker’s heart broken. Don’t be prejudiced against the speaker. Whatever he is trying to say consider it in the same intensity of importance, sadness or happiness as that of the speaker. Maybe the personality of the speaker may be known to you. But don’t prejudice the matter of talk, according to their personality. It will make them uncomfortable to share things with you and make you a bad listener. For example, if someone who exaggerates little things and talks to you can impart a prejudiced feeling in you against him. One day if he comes with a really serious matter, you cannot listen to him if you have that prejudiced mind. So take out the prejudiced mind from you to become a good listener.
Have an Empathy to the Speaker
It’s essential to have an empathy feeling to the speaker in order to be a good listener. It’s not advisable to have sympathy. Anyone who has an hear6t can have sympathy but not empathy. In order to have empathy one should have a wide and kind heart. Empathy is the feeling of placing ourselves in the place of another person and understanding their feelings and pain. Sympathy is just acknowledging their pain and sufferings. If you have an empathy towards the speaker, you will be mentally connected to the speaker and give them more space to open up. It will make you a good listener. For example, if someone who lost his mother in an accident comes up to you and says about his mother you feel the same if you also have lost your mother. Otherwise you will just say your condolences and leave. Empathy is the feeling of having the same emotion and circumstances even if you have not gone through that situation.
Trust the Speaker don’t Suspect him
Someone comes up to you who had fooled or fraudd you earlier and starts to tell you they having some suspicion towards the person. If you are having suspicion towards the person, will you listen to that person? No you will not. Trusting the speaker is the fundamental step you need to adapt to become a good listener. Trust is an element of necessity between two people when they exchange anything, even if it is information or emotions. If the trust is broken, it can be repaired, but the cracks will be there forever. These cracks may decrease the intensity of the trust towards the person and make you short of a perfect listener. If the speaker comes to know that the listener is no longer trusting you, he also will be uncomfortable opening up to you. We trust our doctors and lawyers very much. That’s why we often say that don’t lie to a doctor and lawyer.
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Don’t Interrupt Unnecessarily
It’s the habit of some people that they interrupt the speaker often. They might be asking doubts. Or clarifying things, or proving that they are giving more attention to what is saying etc. whatever interrupting a person while he is talking is the bad habit you can have. It will make you a bad listener. A speaker might be talking things from their mind in a flow. That flow will be interrupted while we interrupt their talking. When we interrupt, they will switch into saying what you want to hear rather than what they want to say. A good listener will always give importance to what they want to tell you rather than what you want to hear. Be a good listener without much interruption.
Give what they are Craving for
A good listener is not just a sculpture. You shouldn’t interrupt doesn’t mean you have to stand still and listen to whatever he says without any comebacks or actions. What they are craving for should be provided. That is what makes you a good listener. Or else they can talk to any rock, or mirror, or non-living substance. You have listened so much that you will be proved what you have done after the talk of the speaker. They will be craving something while they talk. Some people talk to have a solution. Some people talk to make them understand. Some people talk to have a stand beside feeling. Some talk to have a hug and its okay reply. Giving them what they are craving for will make you not only a good listener but also a perfect listener.
Conclusion
It is important to be a good listener. If you are not a good listener you can build relationships with people, you cannot get connected to the people. Being a good listener is like karma, as it gives you good listeners while you want to talk. You can adapt the listening skills and tips from anywhere including the above blog but make sure you are not adapting any of the listening skills shown in the channel discussions. Be a good listener, be a good speaker, be a perfect human being. Entri is there in your path to make you perfect. Keep studying keep winning